Pen Turning Lore VI - The War of the Roses

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mark james

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Pen Turning Lore, Myths and Fables - VI

The War Of The Roses

Ah, those Brits have always been a serious bunch. As if they didn’t have enough after fighting the French in the Hundred Year’s War - actually 116 years (1337 - 1453), they decided to return home to - you guessed it, have a short civil war.

So the age-old royal Plantagenet family returned from France after having their truffles and eating them to, came back and looked at each other and decided that England was too small for the two main branches of the royal family, the House of York and the House of Lancaster. Wow, two houses in all of England and that’s one too many - that’s a real estate dilemma. Hey no problem, let’s have a 30 year civil war and give it a cool name: War of the Roses!

So from the First Battle of St. Albans in 1455, to the Battle of Bosworth Field in 1485, a bunch of skirmishes (quite nasty actually) ensued all because Henry VI was a little (NUTS). While the Battle of Bosworth Field heralded in the start of the Tudor Dynasty and the Crowning of Henry VII, a little noted character was actually responsible for the shift in English history.

The Battle of Bosworth Field featured Henry Tudor, Earl of Richmond defeating Richard III the last King of the House of York. Basically, the swarthy Welshmen wanted to finally teach those snooty Northhamptonshiremen how to drink properly.

As the two armies were politely trading volleys of arrows from their trusty longbows, the battle carried on just a bit… too long. Both forces had run out of arrows - horrors! Richard III strode out into the middle of the field with his sword, awaiting a response from the arrow-less Tudors. A final skilled archer armed with a powerful crossbow whispered to Henry Tudor: “He’s within range my Lord, all I need is one last bolt.”

Henry called for all available hand servants to search the rubble of the battle for something, anything that would fit the crossbow, and within moments a scrappy little creature with black beady eyes produced a long object of sorts. It was a pen, crafted of Yew and a metal tip. Long and sharp with odd features extending to each side, it was a most unique pen. The archer said it might be adequate. Notching the pen in his crossbow, the archer let loose and in a flash the pen pierced King Richard’s armor dealing him a fatal wound.

So the Welsh finally ascended to the throne, all due to an ingenious scavenger. Wishing to recognize this last individual, Henry asked “What do you do and what name are you known by?”

“Your Lord, I am one who burrows through discarded debris
looking for items which may still be of value.
I craft many objects with what I find for free,
and although I have no name of significance yet,
I will some day.”​

So yes, a famous Freestyle Pen Crafter saved the War Of the Roses and is responsible for the Crowning of a Welsh King.

And thus the saying was first whispered (Made famous much later by Edward Bulwer-Lytton):

“The Pen is Mightier than the sword”


So fame and glory awaits all you creative types: Freestyle Pen Contest.


Pen Turning Lore, Myths and Fables I - John Hancock's Signature
Pen Turning Lore, Myths and Fables II - Elon Musk and the Chase for his Roadster
Pen Turning Lore, Myths and Fables III - The Scribe, the Master Segmenter and World Peace.
Pen Turning Lore, Myths and Fables IV - The Path to Pen Turning Enlightenment.
Pen Turning Lore, Myths and Fables V - The Tortoise and the Hare.

Addendum: The Four Little Penturner's



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magpens

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Was it a segmented pen ??

Fascinating ... what a story, Mark !!!

Was also fascinated by the reports of the discovery of King Richard III's skeleton found under a parking lot in one of those weirdly named English towns, just a few years ago.

History comes to life !!!

Anybody read the 4 volume set about the Plantagenet Kings by Thomas Costain ? ... outstanding read as I recall from my late teens ... kinda old now and there are more recent books on those subjects .

Now I must go read the "Myths and Lore V" which I seem to have missed.

Glad you have listed and URLed them all, Mark !
 

mark james

IAP Collection, Curator
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Was it a segmented pen ??

Fascinating ... what a story, Mark !!!

Was also fascinated by the reports of the discovery of King Richard III's skeleton found under a parking lot in one of those weirdly named English towns, just a few years ago.

History comes to life !!!

Anybody read the 4 volume set about the Plantagenet Kings by Thomas Costain ? ... outstanding read as I recall from my late teens ... kinda old now and there are more recent books on those subjects .

Now I must go read the "Myths and Lore V" which I seem to have missed.

Glad you have listed and URLed them all, Mark !
Maybe... If so, it may have been paved under with the King :eek:.
 

Anglesachse

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Dec 29, 2014
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Ratingen, Germany
Was it a segmented pen ??

Fascinating ... what a story, Mark !!!

Was also fascinated by the reports of the discovery of King Richard III's skeleton found under a parking lot in one of those weirdly named English towns, just a few years ago.

History comes to life !!!

Anybody read the 4 volume set about the Plantagenet Kings by Thomas Costain ? ... outstanding read as I recall from my late teens ... kinda old now and there are more recent books on those subjects .

Now I must go read the "Myths and Lore V" which I seem to have missed.

Glad you have listed and URLed them all, Mark !
Maybe... If so, it may have been paved under with the King :eek:.
Wierd named towns:

Lake Chaubunagungamaug Webster Massachusetts

Not wierd?:eek:
 

Timber Ripper

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Burlington, NJ
Someone asked me who my favorite author was and i said Mark James..
They didn't say a word but I'm sure they went home and Google'd it.
You may have an outside following :biggrin:
Can't wait for next one.. Thank you Mark!
 

mark james

IAP Collection, Curator
Joined
Sep 6, 2012
Messages
9,457
Location
Medina, Ohio
Someone asked me who my favorite author was and i said Mark James..
They didn't say a word but I'm sure they went home and Google'd it.
You may have an outside following :biggrin:
Can't wait for next one.. Thank you Mark!

I'd hate to think what ghosts in my closet, unpaid parking tickets and minor warrants in far away places they might have found :foot-in-mouth:. I'll keep my doors locked tightly with the lights out for a few years.

But, since you asked: Pen Turning Lore VII - The First Marathon.
 
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