My "helper" is down...!

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robutacion

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Aug 6, 2009
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Australia - SA Adelaide Hills
Hi peoples,

Recently I have seen some agonizing threads from IAP friends, having their wife's going through some bad times, and today after I read the good news about Curtis' wife, I started feeling really bad about the fact that, my my wife Merissa, is also experiencing some bad times, she can't walk (right left knee and muscle troubles, and her hands are all swollen with lumps and plenty of pain.

This has been going on for over 2 months, and test so far indicate that most of it is coming from some damage cause in her spine from an bike accident she had when a young girl.

A few people know about it and I felt that, I was not doing her "justice" by not dedication my own thread about her condition and difficulties, when in reality, she was the only person to be by my side throughout all my attempts to salvage/cut/gather and bring the wood home/storage paddock...!

I have constantly mention her as my "helper" as she is a country girl, a lot younger than me, built strong and used to hard work. When me met 14 years ago, I was still working hard and very agile but that all changed a few short years later, as I was expecting.

Merissa became my right hand on everything, we are together 24/7 and we share the good and bad moments however, I/we didn't know that she was carrying spine problems and other complications from that accident and other damages caused from the extreme hard work she done for years, before we met, Merissa is now 41 years old...!

Since we moved here, to this beautiful part of South Australia, I explained to her how important would be that we could gather as much wood as we could, not only as firewood but also for woodworking stock, that I starting to use as my woodturning hobby.

I was using a lot of wood then, as I got into making big bowls and other big pieces, was normal to bring 1 tonne (trailer full) of wood home and in a single week I would have it all cut up and turned into green turned pieces and put away for drying, bags and bags of shavings and sawdust come out of that little woodturning room, every week, crazy stuff...!

I could not have done half of all that work without Merissas' help and quite often, I shared this though and pics of her working/helping me out with the woods.

In the workshop, she is always doing something, keeping the floor walkable, bin boxes emptied, do some pen blanks sanding, marking and waxing, amongst other stuff, including doing all the Post Office parcels posting, every morning...!

We both had our both hands operated on (Carpal Tunnel), in recent times and since she experience some major troubles with her right knee that decided to stop working. Since then she recovered from that but never fully, she would lose her balance and fall without warning.

Merissa is not exactly a "small" girl with a big bone structure so, falling down hard a few far too many times, didn't help her much, in fact, we think that, some of the problems were cause from a fall she had last year where she landed on top of sharp pointed wood, on her hip and back...!

These last two months, Merissa hardly can walk, she can't stand up for more than a couple of minutes and her hands started to hurt, get swollen and lumpy, something that we still not know what is causing it.

Merissa done a lot of test recently but, none has produce new results, apart from those already know, mainly from her spine, she done some more test very recently and will only know the results, next Wednesday when we both see our GP/ doctor, strong pain killers can only do so much so, we hope that her situation will be able to improve as soon as the doctors have something to work with...!

Once again, I feel that Merissa deserves to have a thread dedicated to her, many of you have received the results of her work also so, is only fair that she gets the recognition she deserves...!

We are not religious but we accept other peoples beliefs, we do believe in "Karma" though, we reckon that, what goes around, goes comes around and in certain occasions, in more ways than one...!

I feel a little better now...!:)

Cheers
George
 
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Lucky2

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George, prayers are being sent your way for Merissa and you both. Hopefully, you'll get some of the answers to the questions that your looking for on wednesday. While reading this post I got to thinking what would I do if my wife were to ever get desperately ill, I would be lost and afraid especially, if there were no answers to what the problem was. Please take care, and keep us informed of her diagnosis.
Len
 

SteveG

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I can easily sense the strong bond that exists between you two. It is real tough to see your "other half" having to deal with severely limiting circumstances, and so I wish the best for you both. I hope the awaited medical news is good, that she can look forward to some real improvement. Hang in there, and keep looking for the bright side...it is there somewhere.
 

robutacion

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Aug 6, 2009
Messages
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Location
Australia - SA Adelaide Hills
Thanks friends,

I believe she will feel overwhelmed by your thoughts and words, she is not a computer person, I tried, didn't work, Merissa is happy that I take care of that side of things however, that makes her miss out on this way of communication that can really become like, being in a big room and conversing with everyone however, I don't mind so much when she misses out on some less friendly "conversations that so often, come and rock the boat.

Anyway, Merissa will be reading all and every one of the posts left for her, I'm sure that will put a smile in her face, that good enough for me...!:)

Cheers
George
 

mark james

IAP Collection, Curator
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Medina, Ohio
My thoughts and prayers are with you and Merissa! The bond and love between you and her are obviously strong - Please keep us up to date - it helps to know that others care!
 

Bob Wemm

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Mar 9, 2012
Messages
1,994
Location
Kalbarri, Western Australia
George and Merissa,
Sorry to hear that Merissa is not flying very high. I knew she was not so good but didn't realise the whole extent of her woes.
I really hope that the news from the latest tests result in some improvement for her.
All the best,
Bob and Betty.
 

Krash

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Albuquerque, NM
George, I am praying for Merissa and for you as you walk through this trial with her as he support and encourager. The most blessed thing a man can have is a wife and companion that complements his life in ways he does not even know. It sounds like God has done that for you in Merissa.
Life is hard and full of challenging situations and how you walk through them reveals your character. Walk well my friend regardless of the outcome for that is what The Lord calls us to do.

Praying for you and Merissa
 

Rockytime

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Prayers going up for Merissa and you. I pray for God's healing to touch both of you. My wife is also my right hand and has been for over 50 years. Hopefully I will expire first. I could not do without her.
Blessings, Les
 

flyitfast

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George, what a team you both are. All the prayers and positive thoughts are there for you and Merissa. Pain is always difficult to deal with - may the faith in your lives stregthen the help the doctors as they find a way to ease the pain and suffering.
Always with you both.
Gordon
 

tonychar

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adelaide south australia
tonychar

hi George I was down at you place two years ago and seen you and Merissa then I was there for the afternoon you sold me some pen blanks and showed me how to use those discs on the grinder I still use then and show others thanks to you. you wife made us feel very welcome down there. I hope you get some good news soon.
A I see a pain doctor down that way you need your gp to send you there it is moore st clinic willunga dr reece henning.it cost but medicare covers I see him for my back it might help you out in future I hope to come back down soon to get some more blanks till then
wishing you both all the best and Merissa rest up NO LIFTING till you know more.
 

robutacion

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Messages
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Australia - SA Adelaide Hills
Hi everyone,

Merissa is just seated next to me reading your messages and I could see a tear in her eyes, she thanks everyone for the thoughts and wishes...!

Merissa is a very special gal, she knows that I speak often of her on IAP and that I wrote many wood stories where I tell everyone, the very important work she does to help me out, some time there are a few pics with Merissa on the background and some on the foreground, Merissa tends to believe that no one gives any attention to her contribution.

This is mainly due to the fact that, (and previously mentioned) she doesn't want to have anything to do with computers, she is happier that way, she prefers her cross words and her film watching, I have no problem with that however, that also contributes for her assumption that no one cares, and while I show her many post where I speak of her, she doesn't follow the follow ups and miss a lot of what other say about her work...!

This was exactly one of the reasons why I decided to dedicate this thread to Merissa, not only because she is not doing too well at the moment, but also to make her realise that infact, a lot of people are aware of how much she helps me with the woodwork and life in general...!

Merissa has been very stressed out about not being able to do the normal things she normally does, she gets frustrated and angry with herself, particularly in the mornings where, getting out of bed is a painful and slow exercise, then her hands are so swallowed and saw that she can do anything, not until she takes the medication and the Oxycontin 15mg starts to numb the pain slightly.

I have been through all that a few times myself, I know out if feels, I wasn't expecting Merissa to develop that sort of problem, not this soon, and I can't stop not feeling guilty to the fact that, was a lot of the heavy lifting and hard work that I requested from Merissa that, make the situation so much worse...!

I have enough spinal problems to know that, I may need all sorts of "help" in the near future, and I have been preparing Merissa for the inevitable, something that she is well aware off since day one, I thought that, she being so much younger than me (41 - 57) would help her to cope with the physical demands of a wheel-chair bound person however, those prospects are slightly changed, for me due to some "interesting/puzzling" internal changes in my spine, in recent years but that, is an issue for another thread, one day so, with the recents "events" I'm starting to wonder, who will need to look after who...??? I thought that I did know the answer, not anymore and that, scares the living life out of me, how am I going to manage that, with my deterioration predictions..???

Make no mistake, I'm not done yet, nor I think that Merissa won't improve,
I will continue to help her, in any way I can, regardless if on 2 feet, on my knees or on my hands, she know that too however, the thoughts are quite scary and we can not disregard any and all possibilities, this has got nothing to be with being negative and or pessimist, is simply considering the options and being as prepare as one can be, if ever...!

With this said, anyone that know me will know that, i don't give up that easy if ever, I am the most determined person you will ever met and know about, and I always say, impossibilities don't exist in my books, I consider those as "things with a greater degree of difficulty", stubborn...?? you bettcha...!:wink::biggrin:

Life goes on...!

Cheers
George
 

plantman

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Joined
Jan 2, 2012
Messages
3,437
Location
Green Bay, Wi
Hi everyone,

Merissa is just seated next to me reading your messages and I could see a tear in her eyes, she thanks everyone for the thoughts and wishes...!

Merissa is a very special gal, she knows that I speak often of her on IAP and that I wrote many wood stories where I tell everyone, the very important work she does to help me out, some time there are a few pics with Merissa on the background and some on the foreground, Merissa tends to believe that no one gives any attention to her contribution.

This is mainly due to the fact that, (and previously mentioned) she doesn't want to have anything to do with computers, she is happier that way, she prefers her cross words and her film watching, I have no problem with that however, that also contributes for her assumption that no one cares, and while I show her many post where I speak of her, she doesn't follow the follow ups and miss a lot of what other say about her work...!

This was exactly one of the reasons why I decided to dedicate this thread to Merissa, not only because she is not doing too well at the moment, but also to make her realise that infact, a lot of people are aware of how much she helps me with the woodwork and life in general...!

Merissa has been very stressed out about not being able to do the normal things she normally does, she gets frustrated and angry with herself, particularly in the mornings where, getting out of bed is a painful and slow exercise, then her hands are so swallowed and saw that she can do anything, not until she takes the medication and the Oxycontin 15mg starts to numb the pain slightly.

I have been through all that a few times myself, I know out if feels, I wasn't expecting Merissa to develop that sort of problem, not this soon, and I can't stop not feeling guilty to the fact that, was a lot of the heavy lifting and hard work that I requested from Merissa that, make the situation so much worse...!

I have enough spinal problems to know that, I may need all sorts of "help" in the near future, and I have been preparing Merissa for the inevitable, something that she is well aware off since day one, I thought that, she being so much younger than me (41 - 57) would help her to cope with the physical demands of a wheel-chair bound person however, those prospects are slightly changed, for me due to some "interesting/puzzling" internal changes in my spine, in recent years but that, is an issue for another thread, one day so, with the recents "events" I'm starting to wonder, who will need to look after who...??? I thought that I did know the answer, not anymore and that, scares the living life out of me, how am I going to manage that, with my deterioration predictions..???

Make no mistake, I'm not done yet, nor I think that Merissa won't improve,
I will continue to help her, in any way I can, regardless if on 2 feet, on my knees or on my hands, she know that too however, the thoughts are quite scary and we can not disregard any and all possibilities, this has got nothing to be with being negative and or pessimist, is simply considering the options and being as prepare as one can be, if ever...!

With this said, anyone that know me will know that, i don't give up that easy if ever, I am the most determined person you will ever met and know about, and I always say, impossibilities don't exist in my books, I consider those as "things with a greater degree of difficulty", stubborn...?? you bettcha...!:wink::biggrin:

Life goes on...!

Cheers
George

George; If you prepair yourself for the worst, you won't be disapointed when things turn better !! Jim S
 

Russknan

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Joined
Mar 13, 2012
Messages
537
Location
Nanuet, NY
George, my good friend whom I have yet to meet, I was so disappointed to hear about Merissa's difficulties as I just came across this thread. It is so hard to see a loved one in pain. With the wonderfully close relationship you two have, I'm sure that you would choose to take it all, if you could. But we have to hope that the doctors will devise a solution to her - and your - neurological issues. With the rapid advances in medicine these days, perhaps there will be a new treatment that will stop any deterioration and even fix what's there. Certainly, that is my hope. Best wishes to you both! Russ
 

robutacion

Member
Joined
Aug 6, 2009
Messages
6,514
Location
Australia - SA Adelaide Hills
hi George I was down at you place two years ago and seen you and Merissa then I was there for the afternoon you sold me some pen blanks and showed me how to use those discs on the grinder I still use then and show others thanks to you. you wife made us feel very welcome down there. I hope you get some good news soon.
A I see a pain doctor down that way you need your gp to send you there it is moore st clinic willunga dr reece henning.it cost but medicare covers I see him for my back it might help you out in future I hope to come back down soon to get some more blanks till then
wishing you both all the best and Merissa rest up NO LIFTING till you know more.

Once again, thank you all for your thoughts and words, Merissa is pretty much the same, maybe a very slight improvement in her leg movements, not much but at least, she is not getting worse and Doctor visit is only a couple of days away so, we wait and see...!

Merissa appreciates to know that, people know of her work involvement with this hobby of mine and that, people is kind to her, just what the doctors prescribed to warm her heart and create a tear in her eye, thanks folks...!

The weather has been wet, cold and humid, three things that don't help much people with bone/joints problems, this is Winter and expected so part of nature, we tend to say that, it all come at the wrong time however, I don't think that would ever be a "good" time for these things, sometimes we just need to be able to blame someone or something, it may not resolve anything but releases some steam, huh...???:biggrin:

Tony, sorry for the delay in replying to your post...!
Is great to know that, among so many people that are far too far away for a visit, there is always someone that have been here and me us personally. If I was the "liar type", the lies wouldn't last long, people that visit get to see what kind of people we are and, will easily verify that Merissa is just a beautiful soul, always willing to do something for you, even if you are a complete stranger. She makes sure, you don't go hungry and thirsty, among other things...!:wink::eek:

She will get better...!

Cheers
George
 
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Band Saw Box

Passed Away Dec 8, 2021
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So to hear about Merissa, I know she her in pain and not able to do much is hard on you both. Evelyn and I we'll lift you both up in prayer. We are going to believe in a full recovery for her.
 
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