That's pretty slim. I like the slimlines, just not the way they write. Better for lefties, though, as the paste ink dries faster. See, there is a plus to them. As has already been said, if the recipient is happy, then it's good. If the recipient is happy, and is also your wife, then it's great!
For me personally, looking at what you have there, I would agree with Mark about losing the kit center band. The long, gradual taper from the top end of the olive pen is actually really nice. I think mirroring that on the tip end would look pretty good without widening again at the center, unless maybe the band was done as a bead. Either way, an overall hourglass shape might look pretty good.