The Ugly Pen Contest

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Scott

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The Ugly Pen Contest

Welcome to the Ugly Pen Contest! My name is Scott Greaves, and I am in charge of this contest. If you have any question or comment about this contest, please either send me a message or an E-Mail. I made up the rules for this contest, and I would be happy to make up some new ones to get myself out of a jam if needed!

This is not a serious contest, although in many ways it may resemble one. It is a contest for serious penturners to use to blow off some steam! Reading anything more into it can lead down that dark and dangerous path to madness!

There will be judges, though you won't know who they are; and there will be prizes, though I'm not sure what they might be as of yet (or if anybody would want them)! Foremost, this contest involves showing strange and disgusting things that somewhat resemble pens, so that we can all make rude comments to each other about them! And with that, the rules:

1) Your entry must be a pen, i.e. If you could bring yourself to handle it, it would theoretically write.
2) You may submit up to two entries, although I can't imagine why you would want to admit to making this kind of mistake more than once!
3) Entries are submitted by posting up to three images of the pen-like item, with or without accompanying story, in this special Ugly Pen Contest topic, part of the Birthday Bash Forum.
4) Anyone may post comments about the entries, although no fights will be allowed, as there are numerous other normal topics available for that!
5) Entries will be accepted from Monday the 9th of February until Midnight (The Witching Hour) Eastern time on Wednesday the 18th of February. Winners will then be posted on the 19th of February. The judge's decision will be final!
6) Prizes will be awarded in five categories:
a) Worst looking normal pen. This is the category for those who tried to make a nice pen, but it turned out ugly!
b) Most disgusting pen. This is for those of you with the perverse sense of humor, but please, I don't want to see a whole string of Ca-ca pens, and no human reproductive organ pens! Remember, this is a family site!
c) Most unusual material. Inventive use of non-traditional materials is King in this category!
d) Just Butt Ugly Pen. This is kind of the all-encompassing category for the entry that is truly just the ugliest around!
e) And the newest category, the Best Comment about an Ugly Pen entry. Yes, now there's a prize for those of you who are too ashamed to show your Ugly Pens, but are still willing to criticize those of us who are willing to show our mistakes! Inventive, and preferably humorous, comments are what will win here!
7) A single entry may win more than one prize, in other words, winning in one category does not disqualify the entry from winning in another category, with the exception being the Best Comment category, for obvious reasons.
8) All entry images and comments become the property of the IAP, to use, or dispose of, as they wish. Yes, blackmail a few years from now is a definite possibility!
9) New Rule! Within 48 hours of posting an entry in the Ugly Pen contest for any of the pen categories, you need to send me a message or E-Mail identifying yourself both by screen name and your real name, and include your mailing address so we can send you your prizes!!! I don't want to have to track you down to get your information later. I feel so strongly about this that if I don't have your information, your entry will be disqualified. Now, for those of you who wish to win the Best Comment category, be watching for the announcement of the winners, because I am going to want your information within 48 hours of when you win. If you don't know how to message or E-Mail me, click on my name to the left of this post, and select your choice for either a message or an E-Mail there on the drop-down list.

Now, lets start seeing some entries!
 
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hewunch

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OK here is mine for, thought it would look good, but not so much.
dots1.jpg

dots2.jpg
 

THarvey

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Anniston, AL, USA
Hans,

That pen is too cool to be in an ugly pen contest.

If you think that is ugly, send it to me. I would be happy to carry that around. :biggrin:
 
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Hans,
don't give up, right now you are in first place!

besides, they are just trying to influence the judge before they post their own.
 
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Okay, I'll cave.

It IS ugly.

It's like...Partridge Family bus ugly...

It's like...Three's Company Mrs Furley's mu-mu's ugly...


Good luck!

(does that get me in the running for Pen Comment competition?)

Gregory of Sherwood Forest
 

mywoodshopca

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OK.. Heres my entry.. I couldnt come to "kill" a pen kit by this.. so since the rules said it needs to be writable.. well.. a bic is writable..:biggrin:

I decided a simple pen is not enough.. so I made a "pretend" business to go along with it.. (if someone likes the idea of this business, I will sell it for only $400,000):biggrin:

Included is 4 pictures..

The AD
The PEN
The BONUS WATERPROOF PEN CASE :wink:
The VICTIM :wink:

WARNING TO MEN!! NEVER BRING THIS PEN INTO THE HOUSE AND HAND YOUR NEWEST PEN TO YOUR WIFE WHEN SHES NOT LOOKING.. IT DONT MAKE FOR A HAPPY WIFE!! DAMHIKT!!:biggrin:

THE AD:

thead.jpg


THE PEN.. IT WRITES!!

thepen.jpg


WATERPROOF CARRYING CASE!!

thepencase.jpg


THE VICTIM

thevictim.jpg
 

wolftat

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Aug 19, 2007
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Location
Fairfield, CT, USA.
Ok here's mine , it's not really ugly but it does use unusual materials .
"It's a pen made from BX electrical cable cast in alumilite.:biggrin:

1_bxcablekitless.jpg
Oh come on Butch, quit showing off. We all like this pen. You are upset because you haven't found a happy relationship with Alumilite yet. It will happen, sooner or later.:) Besides, from what I have seen of your work, this contest just isn't one you will stand a chance in.
 

Scott

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Blackfoot Idaho
Hans – I think everybody is just jealous! Your pen looks plenty ugly to me!

Skip – That Superman pen looks right for this contest! As soon as I post this I'll post the picture of this pen here for you since you have already indicated to me that it is a real entry. Thanks!

Jason – That is a nice cross between warm & fuzzy, and creepy, and has just the right amount of gag-reflex! BTW, I like the dogs with the Billy-Bob teeth!

Butch – That seriously is right on the border of "cool" and "nasty"! Very interesting!

All you entrants - if you haven't sent me your name and mailing address yet, please do so! This is so when you win, we can send you a prize!!! Just click on my user-name to the side of this message, and choose to send me a message. Thanks!

Oh, and Greg, yes that does get you entered into the Best Ugly Pen Comment category!

Keep them coming! Remember, if you've never made an Ugly Pen, we have a Liar's Club Contest for that sort of thing!

Scott.
 
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Scott

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Superman!

This one is from Skip Evans, and is called the Superman.
 

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USAFVET98

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This started out to be my first try at PR. So I decided to incorporate some multi-colored pasta. It stayed together, but maybe would have been better off not.....
uglypen008.jpg

uglypen011.jpg
 

USAFVET98

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Here is another I thought you might enjoy making fun of. I tried to dye birds eye maple and incorporate aluminum as well. It looks like an American flag got hit my a car..
uglypen003.jpg
 

hewunch

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This pic makes me sick just looking at it. Seriously, I have blown chunks that looked exactly like that.

uglypen011.jpg
[/quote]
 

sparhawk

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Rosinton, Alabama, USA.
it aint kitty litter

Well i started out to make a keepsake pen out of my daughters hair(kinda like putting it in a scrapbook from thier first haircut) but after an hour of fighting the ca, hair, tools, wood chips, and everything else that could and would stick to me and the pen, I gave up.:frown: Told my daughter to use it at work handing to people who needed a pen to sign thier credit card slips.:) Niether her or my wife will touch it.:mad:So i guess it ends up here.:biggrin: Hope you enjoy. ugly1.JPG

ugly 2.JPG
 

hewunch

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Well i started out to make a keepsake pen out of my daughters hair(kinda like putting it in a scrapbook from thier first haircut) but after an hour of fighting the ca, hair, tools, wood chips, and everything else that could and would stick to me and the pen, I gave up.:frown: Told my daughter to use it at work handing to people who needed a pen to sign thier credit card slips.:) Niether her or my wife will touch it.:mad:So i guess it ends up here.:biggrin: Hope you enjoy. View attachment 6603

View attachment 6604

Yeah, I can't understand why Mrs. Werewolf doesn't like the pen you made for her.:rolleyes::biggrin:
 

mywoodshopca

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Charlottetown, PEI Canada, Derby Kansas and Canyon
Well i started out to make a keepsake pen out of my daughters hair(kinda like putting it in a scrapbook from thier first haircut) but after an hour of fighting the ca, hair, tools, wood chips, and everything else that could and would stick to me and the pen, I gave up.:frown: Told my daughter to use it at work handing to people who needed a pen to sign thier credit card slips.:) Niether her or my wife will touch it.:mad:So i guess it ends up here.:biggrin: Hope you enjoy. View attachment 6603

View attachment 6604


Interesting! lol

I would like to see the look on the faces of customers with credit card slips..:biggrin:
 

foamcapt40

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Nov 2, 2008
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Delaware, Ohio
Ok here's my entry

This one was my 1st attempt at acrylic. All I had around was a slim funline kit and well.... this was the result!
 

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tommyd

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murrieta, ca, USA.
sorry to put a damper on this

:bananen_smilies047::bananen_smilies047:I only make ugly pens. So i have put a regestered mark on the ugly pen, there for nobody can make ugly pens anymore. :biggrin::biggrin::biggrin::biggrin::biggrin:
I will over look the ones that are already made, just sent me all the prizes and everthing will be ok.:eek:
 

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Scott

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Brian – That noodle pen is just one of the worst looking things I have seen! Good for you! But the second pen is only mildly nauseating.

Hugo – Now that really is revolting! I don't think I'd touch it either!

William – That looks like it tried really hard to be a nice looking pen! Too bad it failed!

Tommy – So this is the definition of Ugly Pen? It is pretty ugly. Not enough to stop the contest though!

I have to admit that I am just flat out thrilled with the entries so far this year! Ugly, nasty, disgusting – they make my ugly pens look almost presentable! Keep going – like Brian, you can enter twice if you'd like!

I am a little disappointed with the strength of the comments this year though. Shoot, my comments are better than most of yours, and I can't even win! There are three nice prizes waiting for those with enough imagination to make the judges laugh and groan at the same time! I did like the Mrs. Farley's Mu-mu bit though! :bulgy-eyes:

Scott.
 

mywoodshopca

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:bananen_smilies047::bananen_smilies047:I only make ugly pens. So i have put a regestered mark on the ugly pen, there for nobody can make ugly pens anymore. :biggrin::biggrin::biggrin::biggrin::biggrin:
I will over look the ones that are already made, just sent me all the prizes and everthing will be ok.:eek:


Tell you what.. If I win, I will mail you the "winning pen" :biggrin: AND I will include the Waterproof pen case!!:biggrin:
[hide] I will only charge you the $44.95 shipping for the pen.. [/stop hiding]:wink:
 

PenAffair

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Sep 8, 2008
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Queensland, Australia
Well i started out to make a keepsake pen out of my daughters hair(kinda like putting it in a scrapbook from thier first haircut) but after an hour of fighting the ca, hair, tools, wood chips, and everything else that could and would stick to me and the pen, I gave up.:frown: Told my daughter to use it at work handing to people who needed a pen to sign thier credit card slips.:) Niether her or my wife will touch it.:mad:So i guess it ends up here.:biggrin: Hope you enjoy. View attachment 6603

View attachment 6604

LOL, that's just gross. I was going to enter the contest, but I don't think I'll bother now, as I doubt much can beat this. You'd have to roll around on the floor after a bikini wax to get any worse :smile-big:.

Russell.
 
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My UGGGGLI Pen

Well I turned this from teak and the top barrel, well, cracked and kinda fell right off, it was sad and I threw it aside. Well wouldn't you know that the bottom barrel started looking a little funny too. then I had a thought, duck tape fixes everything. Scrounging around I found some regular silver and some yellow. Being a discerning pen maker I didn't think that either went too well with the teak, but I did find some purple. So I cranked a piece off the roll and started right in on that top tube so as to get my technique down before I started working on the teak. Well I let the clip slip a little before I got taping, and well - you can see the result. I then started to wrap the teak (if you squint just so you can see a little), and I had to bend that pesky clip out of the way. It didn't bend back very well. Another exciting evening of penmaking...............................
 

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