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Kenny Durrant

Member
Joined
Sep 11, 2012
Messages
2,480
Location
Sachse Tx. 75048
Two old men were talking while the wives cook dinner.
Joe asked his buddy how his memory class was going.
Sam said "It was great. They taught me word association".
Joe asked "What's that"?
Sam said "It's when you think of a word that will help you remember the thing you want to remember".
Joe said "Maybe I should try going. What's the name of the school"?
Sam thought and said "What's the name of the red flower that has thorns and all women love"?
Joe said "A Rose".
Sam Yells "That's it! Hey Rose what's the name of that school I've been going to?
 
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bobjackson

Passed Away Mar 5, 2020
In Memoriam
Joined
Feb 12, 2007
Messages
4,271
Location
Elyria, Ohio, USA. 44035
Two old men were talking, and one said " if I get married again she will have lots of this" and made the universal sign for money. "She will also have these" and made the universal gesture for a big chest. His friend said " I understand you want her to have money, buy why would you want her to to have arthritis in her hands?"
 
Joined
Dec 22, 2017
Messages
3,032
Location
Wolf Creek Montana
A drunk lady staggers into a bar and yells at the Bartender
"Beertender, give me a Martuni I have heartburn"
The Bartender, nicely, tells the drunk lady
"I'm a Bartender not a Beertender, and it's a Martini not a Martuni"
The lady replies "Okie Dokey"
After about 15 minutes the drunk lady again yells out,
"Beertender, give me a Martuni I have heartburn"
The Bartender returns to the lady with her drink and again tells her
"Listen lady, I'm a Bartender not a Beertender, and it's a Martini not a Martuni and you don't have heartburn, your b%&b's in the ashtray".
 
Joined
Sep 24, 2006
Messages
8,206
Location
Tellico Plains, Tennessee, USA.
A man won $50,000,000 in the lottery... he told his wife that he was taking the money with him when he died and

she was to put it in his casket at his funeral.
He subsequently died and the wife was sitting in the front pew with a box in her lap... she walked up to the casket and put it inside and returned to her seat.
Her friend sitting with her exclaimed "You didn't really put all that money in his casket?"
The wife replied, "Yes I did, just like he asked me to..... I wrote him a check."
 

Wagner11

Member
Joined
Jul 8, 2017
Messages
135
Location
Indiana
I know this might be iffy so I'll remove it if necessary.

I bought some shoes off a drug dealer. I don't know what he laced them with but I've been tripping all day.

Sent from my SM-G955U using Tapatalk
 
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