Uncomfortable with a sale

[jcm71]

Yesterday at the Chattanooga Market a higher functioning, but obviously mentally challenged gentleman stopped by my booth. We made polite small talk for about 5 minutes and he eventually ambled away. About an hour later he returned, and we again exchanged pleasantries. He selected a pen (doesn't matter what type) and said he wanted to buy it. Oh, crap, says I to myself.

I asked him if he was at the market with anyone, and he said he was there with his mother and his twin brother. I told him I would love to meet her, and would he mind going to get her. I would like for her to see the pen he wanted to buy. I made that request to him several times. He started getting agitated, and said he was 32 years old and old enough to buy a pen. By the way this guy stood 6'3" or 6'4" and was well over 200 pounds. Now I was thinking he might do something damaging to me or to my booth.

I then told him I would sell him the pen, if he promised me he would go show it to his mother. He promised me he would and I sold him the pen and he went away. I was hoping the mother would stop by my booth so we could talk, and I could give a full refund if necessary, however she never showed.

A short while later I saw him several booths down, talking to another tall man (twin brother?), so I went down to talk to him. It quickly became obvious he was as mentally challenged as his brother. No mother in sight, so I returned to my booth.

Mom never showed up the rest of the day. I am hoping she stops by next Sunday at the market so I can explain the situation to her and give a refund if necessary.

Any advice on how I could have better handled this situation.

 

[KCW]

I think you did all you could have done. The fact that you are willing to give a full refund if requested, is about all you can do. I think you handled it quite well.

 

[mark james]

Hi John.

I admire what you wanted to do (I suspect giving him the pen)..

I will throw out a thought (In a previous lifetime I worked for 9 years with a variety of special needs folks).

This individual may actually work very hard at a profession appropriate to his skills, education and ability. And as such, may feel a great deal of pride in being able to buy things for himself.

I try to be as generous as I can when I have the opportunity, but it is also a struggle not to unintentionally deprive someone the feeling of accomplishment to save and then buy something as a reward for hard work.

This is NOT a criticism of your intentions! Just something to consider.

 

[Joey-Nieves]

I agree with Mark, if next Saturday the mother does come to you, then you can if needed. But I think that if they had the money, then most probably they were aloud to spend it on something for them, just like we do with our smaller kids.
Most probably they are going through the independent life program, and this experience at the market is part of it. On the other hand maybe mom doesn't give a hute, what matters is that you acted correctly!

GOOD FOR YOU
Joey

 

[Timbo]

I have not been in that situation, but I would just sell the pen without question. Despite appearances, the young man could certainly have had the mental capacity to know exactly what he was doing. Questioning him could be taken as an insult. If a parent/guardian showed up later to say it was a mistake for him to buy the pen I would gladly provide a refund.

 

[stonepecker]

It sounds like you handled it in the best manner at the time. Hopefully, the gentleman brings more business to you. And no matter what......You did well and handled this like a good businessman. I wouldn't worry about it.

And if Mother comes next weekend........I am sure you will do the 'right' thing.

 

[gbpens]

I liked your response as I would have done the same. However, Mark brought up a different perspective which most of us would not think about. These things come with experience. It's still a judgement call.

 

[jcm71]

Thank you all for your responses, and Mark for your insight into something I had not considered.

 

[flyitfast]

I believe you have a satisfied customer. He knew what he wanted, thought about it, and purchased a quality gift for himself. You obviously have a strong commitment to customer service.
He is probably sitting at home right now enjoying writing with his special pen.
Well handled.
Gordon

 

[thewishman]

Hi John,

Your desire to make sure things go right for your customer is a great thing, and I admire your concern for him. Please let me share another perspective.

My brother has several handicaps/challenges and he has two passions - nature books and minerals. He has a book collection that many public libraries cannot match, and a mineral collection that is amazing. He saves his money for a couple of mineral shows that are within a couple of hours of home and he makes multiple purchases - some quite expensive.

It is important to him that the dealers treat him fairly and that they work with him as they do their other customers. He is in a wheelchair and he is deaf, his CP also limits his ability to use sign language, so it can be a challenge to communicate with him. He just wants to buy what he likes.

On the other side of the coin. I have seen people jack prices up and try to take advantge of handicapped people - there are few things lower. (I have some stories to tell...)

As long as your price and product were both good, you have done the right thing. Not selling to him would have been upsetting and frustrating to him. Rest easy, you did the right thing.

 

[Ambidex]

What they all said John. I think you handled it as well as possible. For those of us that aren't around special needs people very much it can be uncomfortable because we want to do what's best but we don't have the experience. I think you did very well. IMHO

 

[monophoto]

I have a 36 year old son with learning disabilities. So I understand that this situation is uncomfortable.

I can clearly understand the concern that a well-meaning busybody observing the situation might conclude that a business transaction with a disabled person is manipulative and takes advantage of that person's handicap., and attack you for being crass and inconsiderate.

That kind of thing certainly can happen - for example the scams targeting senior citizens. But the problem is that it is too easy to have reduced expectations about the abilities of a person who is obviously challenged. But as Chris pointed out, people with challenges often have the ability to live lives that are relatively normal, as redefined by their disabilities. As lesson that my wife and I have learned is that we have to treat our son as a normal adult; there is nothing more frustrating to him than for people to underestimate his capabilities.

I think you did the right thing.

 

[greggas]

There is nothing wrong with selling a pen to an adult with "mental challenges". He is an adult and can make his own decisions. Buying a pen is not life or death decsion so I see no trouble in selling this 32 year old adult a pen the same way you would someone without the same issues.

Folks with handicaps of all types just want to fit in like everyone else.

You did absolutely nothing wrong in selling him this pen and I would suggest that you may even offend the mother if you pursue her at a later market.

 

[JimB]

You should treat this customer as you would any other customer. He had his own money and was purchasing an item that was not dangerous. This is one of many ways the mentally ill work to be independent. You also want to treat him the same as other customers so you don't have a complaint, even a lawsuit, filed against you for discrimination. You should not require him to bring another adult to approve the purchase.

I worked in retail for over 30 years. You always need to treat all customers the same. The one thing we would do in a situation like yours was to give a refund to the customer in any situation, even if the merchandise was damaged. It's the right thing to do.

 

[edicehouse]

90% of the people do not see the value in a handmade pen. Your fear of being viewed as someone taking advantage of a handicapped person has merit. The last thing you would want is for someone to come up and make a scene. So I think you did the right thing and are willing to do the right thing down the line. Don't change how you did it.

 

[edicehouse]

Just make sure if you see him next week, make sure you say hi to him.

 

[SAWDUST 101]

I think this was handled very well but has anyone considered if this was bought for a Mothers Day gift??????

Don