Curious how you'd handle this?

[SDB777]

Been on a bowl making binge as of lately, and they are everywhere in the house....you know how it is, if there is a flat spot, then it has a bowl on it.

Anyway, I decided I'd hand out a few to some friends and such at work. All were very well received and they just loved them. Thanks were given and the like. This was on Monday. I was in a giving mood, and thought I'd do something nice.

This last Thursday, I go into work and one of the girls in the front office said she took her bowl home and her friend came over. The friend apparently spent a lot of time admiring this one....She sold her the bowl for $10!

She came to me on Thursday telling me she could sell 10 more if I would make them for her. When I told her there would be no more bowls she got mad, that the bowls I make are generally fetching $5 to $7 per inch in diameter, and she just sold a $85 bowl for $10


So, has this ever happened to anyone else?
If so, how did you handle it?





Scott (the value of a gift.....ugh) B

 

[Charlie_W]

WOW!.............
I wasn't expecting that twist in the story.



Do you mind if I share this experience with our woodturning club?

 

[firewhatfire]

I would tell her to go buy her bowl back. Most folks understand errors in judgement,especially if they are friends.

 

[mecompco]

Hmmm--when I give a gift, I give it freely and it is no longer mine. The recipient is free to do whatever he or she wants with it. I think you handled the situation well. She was free to keep/give/sell/toss in the fireplace your wonderful gift since it was hers. You, of course, are free never to give the ignorant (impolite word) any more gifts.

Regards,
Michael

 

[JimB]

I wouldn't be happy about her selling a gift I gave her but it is hers to do with what she wants. She obviously has no clue about the value of the bowls or that she should have referred her friend to you to buy one instead of selling the gift you gave her.

After I calmed down about the situation, depending on the person, I might tell them that if they refer someone to me and I sell them a bowl I would give them a commission. If she actually knows people that will buy them at the real price you may have a good business opportunity. The truth is, sometimes in business you need to have a thick skin and not let things bother you otherwise you will not sell to anyone. Of course I'm assuming you want to sell more bowls.

 

[RKB]

I'm with Charlie...WOW.

I had somewhat similar situation happen. I took my pen collection to a "family" get together/birthday party. I shared/showed the collection with the folks there and offered to give the "birthday" person whichever pen they wanted. They took one and then came again later and wanted another one, when I asked if they didn't like the first one, the response was i need one for my wife too, I smiled and let them have another. I don't take the collection with me anywhere anymore. Folks really don't have a clue.

 

[mrcook4570]

Once given, people are within their rights to give, sell, use, admire, etc. anything given to them. If you so choose, you are within your rights to never speak to or give that person anything again.

 

[stonepecker]

When I give people a gift........it is theirs.

With some I say nothing. However, I have told people the value of things are at times. Sometime like "If I was selling this ..... I would charge $XXX." OR "I know someone who sold one like this for ....."


Everyone values things differently. Don't loose any sleep over the stupid actions of one person. Sounds like you learned something with this giving. It has happened to me and others. It will happen again. Keep your heart open and don't be surprised again. It just is the way others think/behave that tends to make me wonder at times.

Enjoy the hobby.......Forget the fools.
JMHO

 

[jttheclockman]

I am sure we all have had similar things happen but maybe not with bowls. It becomes a slippery slope when you start going that way. You want to do some good but it may come back at you and put you in a difficult position. As mentioned you do need to have thick skin and stand your ground.

You may make a pen for a friend or relative and either give it to them or charge them very little money. Now they show their friends and they want one but when they approach you the price is much more than they expect and then get mad either at their friend or you. Sometimes people do not stop and think, just react.

I say you should have told her for any more bowls to be purchased they would go through you and they will be at your selling price. You can invoke a friends discount or give a finders fee to the first person that refers them to you if you like. Also explain what you did originally and that would make that person feel a little small and disappointed. Now if it is a good friend you may want to chuck it up to a mistake and a learning experience and make another for her but that is your call. Good luck.

 

[Sappheiros]

I think there's a phrase out there to answer any question! For this situation, I'd have to say you reap what you sow. People can teach lessons as parents, but for a friend it can be a bit more difficult. I would have explained to her the time and money that goes into a project but also the intrinsic value of it. Each of my pens I make is a piece of me and if I give it, I give it willingly, but just know it has value to me. I would feel hurt, but I wouldn't express that. I prefer to keep friends as friends. A math lesson would do just fine in this situation. Cost of materials, cost of time, and yet I have this to you for free as a good friend.

When I started penturning, some friends expressed interest and I promised my good friends free pens. I'm a giver and I love to share, but when friends (acquaintances) I wasn't as close with began to ask, I mentioned payment. We have to remember our own self worth.

 

[Monty]

When I give a pen or sell at a discount a pen that has been requested to a friend. I always I always say that should anyone ask, my selling price is $XX.

 

[Rockytime]

I has a similar experience. My wife gave out primary care physician a bullet pen. His response was, "Thanks but my wife will want one too." My wife graciously gave him another pen. This guy can afford my entire collection with his pocket change. On the other hand I gave a pen to my pastor. I also gave my Rabbi two Vertex with Olive wood pens. He wanted two more for two Rabbinical friends and insisted on paying me $100 each. Of course I did not charge him. I give away most of my pens and sell just a few. The pens I give away are usually slim lines. Pricier pens I reserve for sale.

 

[SDB777]

I know gifts are gifts, to do as the recipient wants to do with the gift.
I know some don't understand 'values', and I certainly didn't want to let folks think that the value of the gift given is an indication of monies given(if that makes sense).

The downside I was seeing, is now their friends think my works are worth $10....I'll never be a provider for any of them because of the $10 sale from this one person(they will forever think any bowl on the free market is worth $10, or even less-it was some nice timber I used).

Lesson learned....I'd have rather the person gave the bowl away as another gift.





Scott (thanks for the venting) B

 

[jttheclockman]

Scott I do not think others will think your bowls are $10. The person who sold it had the right to do so but they could not make the claim they made it so they have no knowledge of what it is worth. If anyone approaches you asking for one you need to do your sales pitch and if that requires explaining the situation then so be it. Don't worry about it. Chalk it up to another of life's learning experiences.

 

[duncsuss]

When I've given away a bowl, it has been signed with "Made for XXXXX by Duncan Suss".

 

[GaryMGg]

Scott
I'm doubtful the rest of the recipients will think they got a $10 bowl.
They're more likely to think the 'seller' is a foolish tool.

 

[leehljp]

I will often tell people what the typical item will sell for so they won't go doing this sort of thing.

I had this happen while overseas. A fairly wealthy cousin emailed me and asked me to make and bring back 4 fairly nice pens and cases for HS graduation gifts. She said I would be well compensated. I didn't talk price because I know that she can be generous. (my mistake!) She gave me $200! I had $200 in just the four pen parts!

I chalked that up to my mistake. I now let people know the price of material, time and artistic value of the things I make, even in gifts.

Some people just do not understand or know the real value of things. If it is home made, then it is cheap, they think.

 

[robutacion]

Well, I'm with you on the use of any flat spot in the house, the wife just loves to display my work, any sort...!:wink::biggrin:

As for you "giving mood" and what you got in return, that is another very different issue and while I have also experienced identical situation, I think that you may have had resolved the issue if you would invite her to go to the wood shop and have her to buy a bowl blank and then, take her to your work-shop and teach her how to turn a bowl, from beginning to end (finish).

At the end of the session, I would invite her to go and sell that bowl for the $10.00

On the other hand, these $10 to $20 mentality persons are everywhere and this person show that, she gave no value to what you gave her, she only saw the possibility to make a few quick bucks, after all cost her nothing, right..>??

There would be a waste of time to try explaining anything to people like that and I wouldn't be feeling that others may think your work only worth $10, if they think like that, they are not the type of crowds you need to mix with for your sales, period...!

Cheers
George

 

[raar25]

You should have just told her sure, what size do you want, I typically get $10/inch diameter. I can have them to you in two weeks will that be cash or charge?

 

[BSea]

I would have said. "Great idea, Why don't you give me about 20 $10 bills. I know I could sell them for a dollar!"