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Old 11-09-2017, 01:33 PM   #1 (permalink)
 
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Default Modified Raw v6

Hereís the latest. Brass with stabilized B/W ebony, acrylic cap and cz finial. C&C welcome and appreciated. (I think that this one has too much taper)
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Old 11-09-2017, 04:35 PM   #2 (permalink)
 
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I think that you really improved the look of the RAW. This takes it from functional to elegant. And the taper is quite satisfactory to my tastes.
Nice job all around.
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Old 11-09-2017, 04:39 PM   #3 (permalink)
 
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That's a really nice and individual pen. The taper seems excessive in the first photo but I think it's because of the angle of the shot because in the second side-on photo it looks spot on

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Old 11-09-2017, 04:56 PM   #4 (permalink)
 
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Looks Great !!!! . What does cz finial mean ?
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Old 11-09-2017, 05:23 PM   #5 (permalink)
 
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Thanks!
I think the pics are a little deceiving. It tapers from .477 at the cap junction down to .307.
Not much left of the kit on this one. Iím just a couple steps/parts away from kit less.
Magpens - there is a 10mm cubic zirconia in the finial.
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Old 11-09-2017, 08:24 PM   #6 (permalink)
 
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Looks nice. Are you cutting down the brass part with the threads and using it for the cap or cutting your own threads in the cap?
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Old 11-09-2017, 09:00 PM   #7 (permalink)
 
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Hi Patrick: You did indicate C & C welcome...

The lower blank looks perfect and beautiful to me! I have no suggestions!

The upper blank, if I see the pictures clearly, is not turned down enough at both ends. Especially at the upper end, by the finial/clip, I suspect you have some room to sand it down a bit closer. This will lead to a nice design element to sand down the lower end of the upper blank, to make the transition between blanks a bit more "complimentary." Just some thoughts - ignore at will!!!

When I do this type of "end-result critique," it is helpful for pens in the future! The current pen, may be gone, but we can always improve.

These are just suggestions and thoughts to consider!!! Nonethless, an awesome pen!

EDIT Comments: Looking back at your pictures, it almost looks as if you WANTED a shoulder at the upper finial, which looks fine! In that case, if correct, then I still recommend tweaking the taper toward the upper blank bottom section outer dimeter by the center ring.
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Last edited by mark james; 11-09-2017 at 09:04 PM.
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Old 11-09-2017, 09:45 PM   #8 (permalink)
 
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Quote:
Originally Posted by blade.white View Post
Looks nice. Are you cutting down the brass part with the threads and using it for the cap or cutting your own threads in the cap?


I am cutting down the cap and using the threads. The connector threads measure 9.83mm. Iíd guess these are machine cut so matching the cap threads is beyond my abilities.
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Old 11-09-2017, 09:54 PM   #9 (permalink)
 
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Thanks Mark! I do appreciate constructive criticism. Iím learning and hope to improve the designs as I go. Itís helpful to get feedback. Yes, I did the top finial like that on purpose but do think you are right that it would look cleaner without the shoulder. Iíll either make another one or do it on that he next. i think it will help to bury the clip a bit also. Are you thinking that if the cap was more V shaped it would improve the look?
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Old 11-09-2017, 10:27 PM   #10 (permalink)
 
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Quote:
Originally Posted by PatrickR View Post
Thanks Mark! I do appreciate constructive criticism. Iím learning and hope to improve the designs as I go. Itís helpful to get feedback. Yes, I did the top finial like that on purpose but do think you are right that it would look cleaner without the shoulder. Iíll either make another one or do it on that he next. i think it will help to bury the clip a bit also. Are you thinking that if the cap was more V shaped it would improve the look?
This is a tough one to give suggestions too...

Actually, I like the top upper blank by the clip. A nice shoulder, but still looks appealing to me. ...

If it was me... I would aim for a slightly thinner lower, upper blank transition by the centerband. A very minor adjustment... We are picking hairs now!!! All my suggestions are that - suggestions: consider at will!!

PLEASE: These thoughts are simply suggestions for your consideration. As is... Wonderful!.

Keep tweaking, you're on a nice path for what you want to display.

Have FUN!
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